By Ben, 17 March 2020
“The Bland Sisters look forward most to the evenings, when they entertain themselves by reading the dictionary to each other, then staring at the wallpaper until they fall asleep.”

Several years ago, the Senior Blands went to run an errand. They never returned. Their two children, Jaundice and Kale (their real names) could have gone on a tear, thrown boisterous parties or played video games all day while eating crisps. They did not. Instead, the identical twin sisters fell into a routine that included darning socks for a living, reading a dictionary for pleasure (as well as for knowledge and insider tips), watching grass grow and consuming cheese sandwiches. The Bland Sisters loved their introverted, predictable, simple and efficient lives. Until a knock sounded on their front door. Continue reading


I was 10. I remember cycling to our neighbourhood kedai runcit (convenience store) in Ipoh, the sleepy town in Malaysia where I grew up. I had to pick up some freshly squeezed coconut milk, a loaf of Sunshine bread and a box of Kotex sanitary pads. The Ah Soh at the store handed me the items, but insisted on wrapping up the box of pads with newspaper before I could leave. I didn’t want to miss the start of Gilligan’s Island so I said I didn’t care if it was wrapped or not. “Shameful mah!” she whispered, pushing the parcel into my hands as if it were contraband. For many years afterwards, her words echoed in my ears every time I went to buy pads, by then for my own use, and my cheeks would burn.
“When our teacher says,